A Brief History of Divorce: A Story of Women’s Empowerment

March 8th is International Women’s Day, a day to recognize and celebrate the achievements and contributions of women in advancing society, but also to reflect on just how far women’s rights have come (and how far they still have to go).

Statistics show that these days, nearly 70% of divorces are initiated by women. This number is surprising because in non-marriage relationships, women and men seem to initiate breakups at about the same rate. So why are women more often the ones to seek divorce? The truth behind the data is a story of women’s empowerment. 

Historically, divorce has been closely tied to women’s rights. Before women had the right to work, marriage was not just a romantic union, but also one of economic necessity. Even if the love was lost, wives and mothers were forced to stay because they had no financial opportunities outside of the home and relied instead on their husbands to support the family. As women gained the right to work outside the home, and as technology made housework easier and more efficient, they became empowered to leave marriages that left them unhappy because they had more economic opportunities.

The advent of the birth control pill in 1960 also contributed to women’s advancement in society and sparked an evolution in the lives of wives. Women could postpone motherhood or prevent it altogether, and childless women were more likely to leave their relationships than those with children. Contraceptive use also meant that women could seek years-long educational opportunities and begin professional pursuits without having to balance the demands of work and child care. As they built up careers, women in dissatisfactory (or worse, abusive) marriages no longer had to stay for the kids or because they were financially reliant on their husbands.

As women increasingly began working outside the home, the balance of housework labor shifted as well. Since women no longer had to depend on their husbands for monetary support, and with fewer hours spent at home, many men began to help more with the housework and child raising, and those who didn’t may well have been shown the door. Though that isn’t to say that things are perfectly equal in modern times. Separation of household duties is still an issue in many marriages today, and even where the physical labor may be more balanced, women often take on most of the burden of emotional labor in a marriage – including dividing up the household tasks, planning events or scheduling appointments, handling gift giving, and taking the initiative in maintaining social relationships. Emotional labor is frequently unseen and unrecognized by one’s partner. Over time, this “invisible” burden can weigh heavy, and statistics show that women are more likely to leave unhappy marriages, whereas men tend to be satisfied just maintaining the status quo. 

But do women actually feel empowered after a divorce? Surveys say yes. A majority of women report that they feel happier after their divorce is finalized, and many say they were inspired to “reinvent” themselves following a split. 

On International Women’s Day, take a beat to recognize your own accomplishments and/or those of the women around you. And if you’re unhappy in your marriage, know that you have the power to change your situation and write yourself a new chapter.